When working with clients after the discovery, I use the phrase "the lion is in the home". I describe how your body- gut or discernment senses something is off, but can't identify what it is. And when there is the discovery, you begin to connect the dots realizing it was the lion.
THE LION, aka betrayal, was in the home. It had disrupted safety, but you didn’t know that's what it was. How could you protect yourself from the unknown? The phone calls, changes in routine, the mood swings, preoccupation, distractions, etc was the lion, you just didn't have words for it.
When the lion is in the home, identifying betrayal.
After betrayal, sometimes your emotions feel like they’re in control, not you. Anger, fear, sadness, anxiety… they can come on quickly because your nervous system is trying to protect you.
Your emotions aren't the enemy. But it's important to learn how to regulate your body.
Take a pause, breathe, and notice your surroundings. What do you see, hear, smell, and physically feel- temperature, ground, etc. This helps us to move more present.
If able journal thoughts, identifying feelings, and move towards in the next 5 minutes "I will...take a walk, drink water, take a shower, stretch, etc.(something healthy and safe)
Regulation isn’t ignoring your emotions.
It’s creating space to choose what you do with them.
Regulation isn’t ignoring your emotions.
It’s creating space to choose what you do with them.